When I am worried (or anxious) about something I have what I call “anxiety” dreams. Usually they are extremely vivid dreams, sometimes having to do with whatever I am anxious about- but sometimes not.  One thing they ALL have in common is I usually end up waking up more tired then when I went to bed- which invariably puts me in a fairly bad mood for a good portion of the morning.

Well THE BIG OFFICE MOVE OF 2008 is something that I am semi-anxious about. I admit I don’t like change so a big part of me wants to stay in the building/office I am currently in. I love the location of this office and its nice and big. It has its downfalls (Lousy cell reception! No window! Shared space! Parking sucks! No breakroom!). But I have come to really enjoy being in this area for the most part and the other people housed in this building are for the most part really nice.

The new office has a lot going for it: I will have my very own office- no sharing! The building is brand spanking new (not recycled military like the building I am in now). There is HUGE breakroom with two HUGE stainless fridges, two microwaves, tons of counter space and an incredible view.  While my office doesn’t have a window there is a gorgeous skylight right outside my door so there is lots of natural light.  There is a cell tower just up the street so that theoretically should solve the cell reception issues (for those all important text messages you know).  There are several huge parking lots in the immediate vicinity of the new building. Not to mention a beautiful landscaped park area directly behind the building. if it sounds like I am trying to convince myself that this is a great place to be… you have hit the nail on the head.

My office is located deep in the midsts of the third floor of this three story building. Our little group will occupy a small four-office span of hall….we will be surrounded by people with who are in a completely different orangization within a completely different department.  There were mumblings that our department had to “fight really hard” to even get space in this building at all.  So the politics of the whole thing are…awkward to say the least.  I feel like an interloper of somesort and I haven’t even moved yet.

I have been in this new building exactly ONCE - about 4 or 5 weeks ago.  It still smelled of fresh carpet and paint…as a matter of fact- I had to wear a hard hat while on the tour (gotta love helmet hair!)  There was no furniture in 90% of the building. We were shown our little area of offices (I quickly claimed office 14)  which were still in the process of being assmbled.  I was showing the breakroom (TO DIE FOR)…and the bathroom.

My big issue? I have no sense of direction. It’s a running joke in my family that if you put a paper bag over my head spin me around twice and take it off I would be lost. Unfortunately it’s not that far from the truth. It’s not uncommon for me to get turned around in my own town…that I have lived in for about 90% of my life (and all of my driving life).  My mom said the other day she was trying to figure out where I get this lack of a sense of direction from since my parents both have a good sense of direction as does my brother.

My anxiety dreams seem to be based on this fear that I have about the area. Its very much a labrynth up there and I kidded with my coworker when we were on the tour that I would need a gps to find my way to the bathroom. Except not.  I have been having restless, vivid “anxiety” dreams of being lost. So far I have been lost in a maze, in the forest, at work, at las vegas motorspeedway, at Laguna Seca raceway twice, in the grocery store and in my old high school.  Sometimes I am being chased (at work, in the maze and in the forest). Sometimes I have some pressing meeting or place I need to be (the speedway, the old high school). Sometimes I am trying to find someone (Laguna Seca raceway- once with my mom and once with my friend in two separate dreams). And at the grocery store? Well I was just lost trying to find the produce section. There is no way I can explain the extreme vividness of the dreams- or the extreme grouch I am when I wake up after a night of being lost.